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What Keeps Me From Writing

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When I was a child I liked to write letters to my friends. I had a lot of pen-pals. Also, I had no problems with essays during my grade school years. I did not need much time to create an essay, or a journal, or something else for my writing class. The older I become, the more difficult it gets for me to write. Perhaps, I have more problems, needs, or other various things in my life that keep me from being able to focus on writing. Therefore, when I read “The Watcher at the Gates” by Gail Godwin, I saw myself there. In this essay, Godwin illustrates examples of many things that may be obstacles to some people to start writing. Also, she suggests several ways that may help people to overcome such a problem. Although I have different kind of excuses to not start writing, they all have the same meaning, purpose, and consequences as in Godwin’s essay: take me away from writing. There are some of my favorite excuses such as having no ideas to write about, other important things to do, and enough time before the deadline, that give me no good chance to begin writing. Still, I know that I must turn in my assignments on time, and this helps me to put aside these excuses.


The first reason why I don’t sit down and write is that I don’t know what to write about. I just have nothing in my head to write about the particular topic. Often, I begin with a couple of sentences and stop because I don’t have good thoughts to continue. In these cases, begin to look out my window, my eyes wander around walls in my room searching for ideas. During such moments, I silently repeat these words to myself, “What do I write about? What’s next?” This may last ten minutes, or twenty, or even an hour.


Sometimes, I just put all of my papers away and do something else, but usually (I have already begun!) I don’t allow myself to give up writing. Also, I tell myself, “I should write because I must, because I will write this anyway today or tomorrow. Why not do it right now?! So, write!” In addition, I try to begin from the middle. For example, if I need to write an essay, I don’t always begin with an introduction. Often, I write body paragraphs, then introduction. Then I may correct my paragraphs or even swap them, and then I write a conclusion. Very rarely do I write a conclusion first, and then the rest of the essay. Although it may look funny to start an essay with a conclusion, sometimes this helps me to stick around and continue writing.


Homework for a different class, some reading assignments, housework, or (to make a long story short) other important things are my next excuse to avoid writing. Like writers, those watchers tell them, “ ‘Don’t try and continue with your book till your dental appointment is over’ ”, I yield to a pull to do some other things, which seem to me very urgent and the most significant in the world. For example, when I think that I need to write an essay, I suddenly remember that there will be a test tomorrow, and I need to reread several chapters for that test or I need to start cooking because my husband is due to come from work anytime. Therefore, my writing is postponed to a later time, then again it’s put off till one hour later, and finally it is so late that I can hardly keep my eyes open, and I need to go to bed. “Well, I’ll do tomorrow” – but tomorrow everything may repeat again. In order to handle the situation, I don’t write “while the kettle is boiling”, yet I do something similar. For example, I can write a part of my essay while a cake is baking in the oven or while my husband goes grocery shopping taking my little daughter along. Although I don’t like to write in these conditions, it gives me a chance to begin writing something. Usually, I try to make my schedule so that I have enough time to begin and to finish my essay.


The last reason not to write immediately is a due date that is pretty extended in the future. It is my favorite of favorite excuses. Though I like to write essays or other written assignments ahead of time, it does not happen frequently. Usually, I tell myself, “Don’t worry. You will make it on time. You still have a whole week!” However, when one of two days remain before the due date, I start blaming myself for wasting so much time, become nervous and even angry. It is not only because I need sometime to think and create something, to correct and type it, but also because it is the time when I need to finish some projects for another class or prepare for test(s). As for me, it is very difficult to overcome this problem and begin to write earlier before other due dates come and take all of my time. Indeed, I feel happy and free when I write an essay as soon as I get an assignment. Now I won’t have headaches or worries that I still have to write an essay. To start writing ahead of time I also try to think that every next day is a due date, so I don’t have extra time to write. Sometimes, it helps me, but usually I just give in to my excuse to not write until the deadline starts pressing really hard.


Whatever excuses are to avoid writing – big or small, reasonable or not – they disturb normal life of any person. I can say that I have nothing to write about, I am now too busy to write, or I have a lot of time before I have to turn my writing assignment in. All these ways of justification only help me to feel bad and strained. On the other hand, I am in the very good mood if I finish my writing sooner than later. It should be my best purpose to write, and I should not yield to any excuses or reasons not to write.


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